I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
