Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
