Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
