I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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