it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
