I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
