Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
