Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize