we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
