Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
