Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
