we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize