the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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