Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
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and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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