is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
