This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize