I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
My penis needs a shock collar
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
