And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Drunk is not a location!
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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