what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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