Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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