i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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