I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
