Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Its about making memories worth repressing
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
