That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
