YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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