can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
