Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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