Cold hands, warm shart.
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
my vag is so smooth its legendary
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I need a beard to bite.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize