All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
send nudes
from the living room?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
