just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize