why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize