Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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