If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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