lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Randomize
