your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
