his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
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don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
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I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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