She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I touched a dick in church today
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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