Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Randomize
