addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize
