The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
