Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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