Just mADE A PArabola og urine
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
