redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
