Duck Duck Cougar?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
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