Betty ford says i'm here all night
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
