He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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