Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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