Your face is a jimmy john
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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