If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
