Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
