he thought i was a dude.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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