whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I can't trust your balls anymore.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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